Tuesday, November 1, 2011

Fun With Astrology: The Video Series

For the many of you who asked (and bless ye, by the way), "Conquer The Universe With Astrology" (and me, for that matter) will be back in a couple of weeks, with more and better guests, amusements, and astrology than ever.

In the meantime, it turns out many of you haven't been introduced to my video series. Here are the links... have a listen to your Sun Sign and be mildly offended... then listen to everyone else's and be amused and informed.



Fun With Aries

Fun With Taurus

Fun With Gemini

Fun With Cancer

Fun With Leo

Fun With Virgo

Fun With Libra

Fun With Scorpio

Fun With Sagittarius

Fun With Capricorn

Fun With Aquarius

Fun With Pisces

Wednesday, September 28, 2011

Conquer The Universe With Astrology: Romance, Seduction, And Aches And Pains

On the next "Conquer The Universe With Astrology," (Thursday at 10 PM Eastern, 7 PM Pacific) we'll be covering a lot of ground, and it's all worth the trip:

HOUR ONE: Listen to my interview with novelist Sara Humpries. The first volume of her "Amoveo" series, Unleashed, is about to hit the shelves, and is the first of a multi-part series. Does writing ability show in a birth chart? A tendency to write romantic fantasy novels? How about that childhood crush on Captain Kirk? And are bigger things coming in the next few months? Have a look at the chart below, listen to the interview, and play along!

THEN: Carrying on with the romance theme, I will be beginning a new twelve-part series...

LET'S ALL SEDUCE SOMEONE WITH ASTROLOGY!

This episode: How to seduce an Aries... man or woman... by Sun, Venus and Mars sign. Listen to this show (and the next eleven), and you'll be The Most Dangerous Dater on your block.

HOUR TWO: I interview medical astrologer Eileen Nauman about the role of Mercury in the birth chart as it relates specifically to your physical condition. It's informative, it's entertaining, and it's more proof that Astrology is probably even more awesome than you realized.



Here's Sara's chart... click it, it gets bigger:


Wednesday, September 21, 2011

Conquer The Universe With Astrology: Three-Way Karmic Action!

On the next "Conquer The Universe With Astrology":


FIRST: Karmic Astrologer Marguerite Manning joins me to discuss "FATHER HUNGER AND MOMMY DEAREST: ARE YOU INVOLVED IN AN UNCONSCIOUS 3-WAY?" (I swear she came up with that title). We'll be talking about all the unconscious ways your Venus and/or Saturn placement can really screw with your love life.



THEN: Canadian recording artist Veronica Start will join us for a very specific look at how that Uranus-Pluto square has panned out in her life so far. 


AND IN BETWEEN: Your questions answered when you call in or join the Chat Room, what to expect from Mars in Leo, and the occasional sound effect.


Thursday at 10 PM Eastern, 7 PM Pacific


(And for those of you who like to play along at home, Here's Veronica's chart, with transiting planets on the outside):


Thursday, September 15, 2011

Conquer The Universe With Astrology - Now With More Scarlett Johansson!

Tonight at 10 PM Eastern (7 PM Pacific): Two hours of non-stop astrological edjucatainment!

HOUR ONE: April Elliot Kent returns to discuss her new book, why Venus in Libra may not be as much fun as advertised, and the astrology behind those nude pictures of Scarlett Johansson that leaked out.

HOUR TWO: Your questions answered... call (323) 443-7252! PLUS: whatever else I can come up with.

Sure, there are other astrologically-based things you could do this evening... but they all suck waaaay more than tonight's show will. Guaranteed.


Check out my show! If you like what you hear... there's more to come in the future! Please feel free to drop by and visit my Donations Page. It's what keeps me going and, and you might just get a surprise...And yes, I still send free stuff to everyone who writes me!

If you're new to this blog, here's a sample of my previous shows and blog entries. Enjoy!

Tuesday, September 13, 2011

Fun With Sagittarius! (Another "Conquer The Universe With Astrology" Original Video)

Oh, Sagittarius... bouncing through life so carefree and-- look out! Whew. Sometimes that easygoing carefree disregard you have for common sense can be a little... what? Ah, I see. You've already thought it out. Well, then, I'm sure that you can go on juggling chain saws indefinitely without harm

For the rest of you, here's Sagittarius...



Check out my show! If you like what you hear... there's more to come in the future! Please feel free to drop by and visit my Donations Page. It's what keeps me going and, and you might just get a surprise...

Thursday, September 8, 2011

"Conquer The Universe With Astrology" Returns Tonight!

No more Mercury Retrograde, no more summer vacation, no more excuses... "Conquer The Universe With Astrology" is back tonight for a new season! (Are there Blogtalkradio seasons? Why not?). Tonight Nadiya Shah will be joining us to discuss her video projects, her upcoming appearance at SOTA to discuss Mars, and more!

PLUS: Debates, void of course Moons, job plans, and why I demand to see Rick Perry's long-form Birth Certificate.

Tonight at 10 PM Eastern, 7 PM Pacific

Check out my show! If you like what you hear... there's more to come in the future! Please feel free to drop by and visit my Donations Page. It's what keeps me going and, and you might just get a surprise...


...And for those of you who like to play along at home, here are the charts for the Obama Jobs speech, and the GOP debate at the Reagan Library. Click on 'em... they get bigger:




Friday, August 26, 2011

Fun With Scorpio! (Another "Conquer The Universe With Astrology" Original Video)

Oh Scorpio... so fun loving, so understanding, so willing to not take yourself seriously... I'm sorry it took me so long to put this together for you, and I know how you love it when someone teases you and denies you and then... please Scorpio, please.. just put the knife down and watch, okay?



Check out my show! If you like what you hear... there's more to come in the future! Please feel free to drop by and visit my Donations Page. It's what keeps me going and, and you might just get a surprise...

Thursday, August 25, 2011

Conquer The Universe With Astrology: Medical Astrology With Eileen Nauman, And Awesomeness With Steven Forrest!

The Universe shouldn't be something that "just happened to you." Conquer it with Astrology! Fun, advice, and an entire Universe in just one show!

HOUR ONE: Medical Astrologer Eileen Nauman discusses weight loss and health from the perspective of your birth chart!

HOUR TWO: Legendary author and astrologer Steven Forrest!

10 PM Atlantic, 7 PM Pacific

Check out my show! If you like what you hear... there's more to come in the future! Please feel free to drop by and visit my Donations Page. It's what keeps me going and, and you might just get a surprise...

Thursday, August 18, 2011

Astrology: Twelve Signs Of Love

Tonight on a Mercury Retrograde encore edition of "Conquer The Universe With Astrology": stuff from last December you probably missed:

HOUR ONE: "Twelve Signs Of Love": true-life stories of love, hilarity, romance, tragedy, sex, friendship, and kitchen appliances based on my e-book, "Love Around The Zodiac."

HOUR TWO: Also from December... my interview with legendary astrologer Michael Lutin!

10 PM Eastern, 7 PM Pacific

Check out my show! If you like what you hear... there's more to come in the future! Please feel free to drop by and visit my Donations Page. It's what keeps me going and, and you might just get a surprise...

Thursday, August 11, 2011

Conquer The Universe With Jeff Jawer And Bruce Scofield!

HOUR ONE:

Q: What do "Your Astrology Guide 2011," "Your Personal Astrology Planner 2011," "Medical Astrology: Healing For The 21st Century," the regular forecast in "Mountain Astrologer" magazine, and Astro*Carto*Graphy all have in common?

A: Jeff Jawer. And he's going to be on my show tonight at 10 PM Eastern/7 PM Pacific!

Yeah, that's one heck of a resumé. Not only that though... he's also a great guy. We'll be taking an in-depth look at the year ahead and how it's going to affect you.

HOUR TWO:

I admit it: I know nothing about Mesoamerican Astrology. I've heard interesting things, certainly... but I freely confess my ignorance on the matter. So it's a good thing that my guest, astrologer and author Bruce Scofield is going to be on tonight's special Tuesday edition of the show.

Heck, long before I'd even heard of Mayan Astrology, Bruce Scofield was a master of Western Astrology. Now his practice includes both. And he's the author of fourteen books and runs One Reed Publications, so one way or another, I'm bound to learn something from tonight's show.

Maybe you will too... but of course, you'll have to listen to find out.


Check out my show! If you like what you hear... there's more to come in the future! Please feel free to drop by and visit my Donations Page. It's what keeps me going and, and you might just get a surprise...

Thursday, July 28, 2011

Conquer The Universe With Sex, Drugs, and Rock And Roll (And Astrology)

Tonight on "Conquer The Universe With Astrology" at 10 PM Eastern, 7 PM Pacific:


HOUR ONE: Artist, author, and rock and roll legend COMMANDER CODY will discuss his new book, smoking pot, the Saturn transit that set his car on fire and kicked off his career path, and... did I mention the whole smoking pot thing?



HOUR TWO: Astrologer Maria DeSimone will discuss teaching astrology, indicators of psychic ability in the birth chart, tortellini, Tauruses, and pole dancing... among other things.




And in between: we'll discuss the upcoming Leo New Moon and how it will affect you, your questions will be answered... call (323) 443-7252)!

Check out my show! If you like what you hear... there's more to come in the future! Please feel free to drop by and visit my Donations Page. It's what keeps me going and, and you might just get a surprise...



Thursday, July 21, 2011

Conquer The Universe With Astrology: Welcome To My Mars Transit

TONIGHT'S SHOW:  the transits of the planet Mars, and how it affects your --

Oh screw it. I don't have the patience for this any more. Screw it
Shut UP you idiot! people are listening!
Ha! Like ANYONE "listens"...

-- moods and those of people around you. Call (323) 443-7252 if you have any questions.It should be interesting and informative fun for all!

"CONQUER THE UNIVERSE WITH ASTROLOGY"
10 PM EASTERN/7 PM PACIFIC


And if you don't like that, do your own damned show. See how YOU like it.

Hope to see you all there! Love and Light!



Check out my show! If you like what you hear... there's more to come in the future! Please feel free to drop by and visit my Donations Page. It's what keeps me going and, and you might just get a surprise...

Thursday, July 14, 2011

Conquer The Universe With Astrology: Full Moon In Capricorn



TONIGHT: moodiness, irritability, bloating... and a Full Moon In Capricorn!


I'll be answering your questions -- call me at  at (323) 443-7252! -- and discussing my mood swings with astrology Amy Herring! Oh, that and her book... "The Astrology Of The Moon"! I'll also be addressing my Top Five List... the top five search terms that bring people to this blog!






Check out my show! If you like what you hear... there's more to come in the future! Please feel free to drop by and visit my Donations Page. It's what keeps me going and, and you might just get a surprise...
And yes, I still send free stuff to everyone who writes me!
If you're new to this blog, here's a sample of my previous shows and blog entries. Enjoy!

Thursday, June 30, 2011

Conquer The Universe With Astrology: The Eclipse Bunker!

The Universe shouldn't be something that "just happened to you." Conquer it with Astrology! Fun, advice, and an entire Universe in just one show! THIS EPISODE: Can opener? Check. Shotgun? Check. Dehydrated food? Check. Okay, it's safe to look at this year's Big Eclipse... tomorrow... and see how it's going to affect you!


Check out my show! If you like what you hear... there's more to come in the future! Please feel free to drop by and visit my Donations Page. It's what keeps me going and, and you might just get a surprise...
And yes, I still send free stuff to everyone who writes me!
If you're new to this blog, here's a sample of my previous shows and blog entries. Enjoy!

Thursday, June 23, 2011

Conquer The Universe With Astrology TONIGHT!

Tonight at 10 PM Eastern (7 PM Pacific): Two hours of non-stop astrological edjucatainment!

HOUR ONE: My guest will be BALROK from "Creepy KOFY Movie Time," the legend of San Francisco late-night television. I'll be discussing what it is in his chart that makes him the ideal man for his job, and I uncover a top-secret project from Balrok's near future!

HOUR TWO: April Elliot Kent returns to discuss her new book that will help you learn astrology from the ground up, help you impress your friends, and ... maybe... get a date!

PLUS: Drinking and Eclipsing with Amy Winehouse, another installment of "How's Matthew's Ass?", and our new feature... "Your Soul Mate Is Hiding In Our Chat Room." Of course, for that one... you should really join us live and be in the Chat Room.

Sure, there are other astrologically-based things you could do this evening... but they all suck waaaay more than tonight's show will. Guaranteed.



Check out my show! If you like what you hear... there's more to come in the future! Please feel free to drop by and visit my Donations Page. It's what keeps me going and, and you might just get a surprise...
And yes, I still send free stuff to everyone who writes me!
If you're new to this blog, here's a sample of my previous shows and blog entries. Enjoy!

Wednesday, June 22, 2011

Eclipse 1, Amy Winehouse 0

TODAY: Many of you may not be aware of my blog at Astrolome.com (which, by the way, is a great astrology application for either iPhone or Facebook). So, here it is... today featuring what the June 15th eclipse did to Amy Winehouse, and why.

TOMORROW: The biggest and bestest "Conquer The Universe With Astrology" ever, featuring both BALROK from San Francisco's legendary "Creepy KOFY Movie Time"...


...and astrologer April Elliot Kent drops by to explain how her new book can change your life! (Well, I figure it could, anyway. She's a little more modest about it.)

PLUS: Your Soulmate Is Hiding In Our Chat Room, and another installment of "How's Matthew's Ass?"

Did I mention your soulmate is hiding in our Chat Room?



Check out my show! If you like what you hear... there's more to come in the future! Please feel free to drop by and visit my Donations Page. It's what keeps me going and, and you might just get a surprise...
And yes, I still send free stuff to everyone who writes me!
If you're new to this blog, here's a sample of my previous shows and blog entries. Enjoy!

Monday, June 20, 2011

Conquer Your Week With Astrology - June 20-25, 2011

Give me five minutes, I'll give you the week ahead! This week: getting the most out of the Jupiter-Pluto trine.

Please excuse the heavy construction noises...






Check out my show! If you like what you hear... there's more to come in the future! Please feel free to drop by and visit my Donations Page. It's what keeps me going and, and you might just get a surprise...
And yes, I still send free stuff to everyone who writes me!
If you're new to this blog, here's a sample of my previous shows and blog entries. Enjoy!


Thursday, June 16, 2011

The New And Improved "Conquer The Universe With Astrology!"

On an all-new "Conquer The Universe With Astrology" tonight...

-Astrologer Claire-France Perez will discuss becoming an astrologer, the Lot Of Fortune, marketing, and dogs.

-Your questions answered! Call me on-air at (323) 443-7252!

-And we'll discuss the effects of Wednesday's lunar eclipse on the City Of Vancouver, The Vancouver Canucks, and in a brand new feature, we'll answer the question... "How Is Matthew's Ass?"


Check out my show! If you like what you hear... there's more to come in the future! Please feel free to drop by and visit my Donations Page. It's what keeps me going and, and you might just get a surprise...
And yes, I still send free stuff to everyone who writes me!
If you're new to this blog, here's a sample of my previous shows and blog entries. Enjoy!

Monday, June 13, 2011

Astro-Mood: Sun Conjunct Mercury In Gemini


"Welcome to Geminis Hair Salon! Today's Special... the Sun (Ego) and Mercury (Thought) are conjunct! Can I get you a coffee? Tea, perhaps? Diet drink? Sangria? Root Beer? Milkshake? Prune Juice? Vodka Martini? Anyway, Today's Special is bound to lead to lots of bold new thinking! That's always a good thing, right? Now, were you looking for a trim? A perm? Dye job? How about extensions, or... I know! A Mohawk! I hear they're coming back! Oh, as I was saying... yes, lots and lots of ideas floating around today, and I'm sure they're all really, really practical and constructive! Brush cut? How about an Afro? Ever try the Bettie Page look? How about highlights? Um, wait a second... what was my original point?


...oh, right... Welcome to Geminis Hair Salon! Today's Special... the Sun (Ego) and Mercury (Thought) are conjunct!"

Check out my show! If you like what you hear... there's more to come in the future! Please feel free to drop by and visit my Donations Page. It's what keeps me going and, and you might just get a surprise...
And yes, I still send free stuff to everyone who writes me!
If you're new to this blog, here's a sample of my previous shows and blog entries. Enjoy!

Sunday, June 12, 2011

Astro-Mood: Saturn Goes Direct In Libra


Oh boy, Saturn isn't retrograde any more! Yayyy! Now everything can go exactly as planned! Yayyy!

...good thing no one else has any plans different from mine.

Check out my show! If you like what you hear... there's more to come in the future! Please feel free to drop by and visit my Donations Page. It's what keeps me going and, and you might just get a surprise...
And yes, I still send free stuff to everyone who writes me!
If you're new to this blog, here's a sample of my previous shows and blog entries. Enjoy!


Thursday, June 9, 2011

Conquer The Universe With Astrology: Last Show Ever?

The Universe shouldn't be something that "just happened to you." Conquer it with Astrology! Fun, advice, and an entire Universe in just one show! TONIGHT: The last show EVER. Well, not really... it's just changing and I love being dramtic. Listen in for details!



Check out my show! If you like what you hear... there's more to come in the future! Please feel free to drop by and visit my Donations Page. It's what keeps me going and, and you might just get a surprise...
And yes, I still send free stuff to everyone who writes me!
If you're new to this blog, here's a sample of my previous shows and blog entries. Enjoy!


Wednesday, June 1, 2011

Jupiter In Taurus And A Solar Eclipse!

Today on a special Wednesday edition of "Conquer The Universe With Astrology": Jupiter enters Taurus. How will affect you in the coming year? PLUS: It's Solar Eclipse Day! How will this affect you personally?



Check out my show! If you like what you hear... there's more to come in the future! Please feel free to drop by and visit my Donations Page. It's what keeps me going and, and you might just get a surprise...
And yes, I still send free stuff to everyone who writes me!
If you're new to this blog, here's a sample of my previous shows and blog entries. Enjoy!


Thursday, May 26, 2011

Three Eclipses, No Waiting!

Three Eclipses, no waiting! June 1st, June 15th, and July first all feature some remarkable stuff. Big, interesting, potentially life-changing stuff. Listen in and find out how it will affect YOU!




...and hey, did you catch my Tuesday show with Nora Jean Stone, of the SF Astrological Society? What, you didn't? Here it is!


Check out my show! If you like what you hear... there's more to come in the future! Please feel free to drop by and visit my Donations Page. It's what keeps me going and, and you might just get a surprise...
And yes, I still send free stuff to everyone who writes me!
If you're new to this blog, here's a sample of my previous shows and blog entries. Enjoy!

Tuesday, May 17, 2011

Repairing Your Love Life With Astrology!

Today, on the biggest, bestest episode of "Conquer The Universe With Astrology":

Hilary Young of Astrologydating.com!

Marguerite Manning, author of "Cosmic Karma"!

...and Christopher Witecki of Soulgarden.tv!

(Oh, and I'll be there too. And there might be a prize or something. And maybe I'll send out free stuff to everyone who writes me. You'd better listen in just to make sure.)

Don't miss it!



Check out my show! If you like what you hear... there's more to come in the future! Please feel free to drop by and visit my Donations Page. It's what keeps me going and, and you might just get a surprise...
And yes, I still send free stuff to everyone who writes me!
If you're new to this blog, here's a sample of my previous shows and blog entries. Enjoy!

Monday, May 16, 2011

Conquer Your Love Life With Astrology!

Tomorrow on "Conquer The Universe with Astrology"... It's a romance Astrolopalooza! We're going to take advantage of that Taurus/Scorpio Full Moon and set some romantic intentions! Maybe you want to understand how your birth chart affects your love life. Maybe you want to know what romantic surprises the future holds. Or maybe you just want to know how to seduce an Aries (or a Taurus Gemini Cancer Leo Virgo Libra Scorpio Sagittarius Capricorn Aquarius or Pisces) man (or woman). Or maybe you just want to hear me talking astrology with three of the biggest and best names out there...

Hilary Young of Astrologydating.com!

Marguerite Manning, author of "Cosmic Karma"!

...and Christopher Witecki of Soulgarden.tv!

Don't miss it!



Check out my show! If you like what you hear... there's more to come in the future! Please feel free to drop by and visit my Donations Page. It's what keeps me going and, and you might just get a surprise...
And yes, I still send free stuff to everyone who writes me!
If you're new to this blog, here's a sample of my previous shows and blog entries. Enjoy!

Tuesday, May 10, 2011

Practical Help For Depression, From Astrology

Astrology can provide a lot of practical help with life... you probably already know about compatibility and predictive astrology. But of course, the observable events of your life are only half the story: your inner life colors and directs everything around it. And when that Inner Life paints everything in shades of blue, it doesn't matter how well or how badly life is really running... it's just all blue.

What can astrology do to help?


Check out my show! If you like what you hear... there's more to come in the future! Please feel free to drop by and visit my Donations Page. It's what keeps me going and, and you might just get a surprise...
And yes, I still send free stuff to everyone who writes me!
If you're new to this blog, here's a sample of my previous shows and blog entries. Enjoy!

Monday, May 9, 2011

Astrology And Depression: There Is Hope (Rescheduled)


The old grey donkey Eeyore stood by himself in a thistly corner of the Forest, his front feet well apart, his head on one side, and thought about things. Sometimes he thought sadly to himself, "Why?" and sometimes he thought, "Wherefore?" and sometimes he thought, "Inasmuch as which?" and sometimes he didn't quite know what he was thinking about.
-A. A. Milne

Depression is probably the most widespread mental health issue people face. Billions of dollars in research, and billions of dollars spent on prescriptions (and prescriptions to boost your prescriptions), books, and more forms of therapy than you can shake a stick at... and are we really any closer to a "cure"? And can astrology really provide help?

Yes it can. Tomorrow, May 10th at 2 PM Eastern (11 AM Pacific) listen in to find out how.



Check out my show! If you like what you hear... there's more to come in the future! Please feel free to drop by and visit my Donations Page. It's what keeps me going and, and you might just get a surprise...
And yes, I still send free stuff to everyone who writes me!
If you're new to this blog, here's a sample of my previous shows and blog entries. Enjoy!

Conquer Your Week With Astrology - May 9-13, 2011

Give me five minutes of your time... I'll give you a work week's worth of forecast!


Check out my show! If you like what you hear... there's more to come in the future! Please feel free to drop by and visit my Donations Page. It's what keeps me going and, and you might just get a surprise...

And yes, I still send free stuff to everyone who writes me!


If you're new to this blog, here's a sample of my previous shows and blog entries. Enjoy!

Monday, April 25, 2011

Fun With Libra! (Another "Conquer The Universe With Astrology" Original Video)

They say Libra is the "partnership sign": always either looking for a partner or compensating for their partner's flaws. Sounds like the kind of people who'll forgive me for a bit of teasing, don't they? Let's find out!


All my other Astrology Videos are HERE!

Check out my show! If you like what you hear... there's more to come in the future! Please feel free to drop by and visit my Donations Page. It's what keeps me going and, and you might just get a surprise...
And yes, I still send free stuff to everyone who writes me!
If you're new to this blog, here's a sample of my previous shows and blog entries. Enjoy!

Thursday, April 21, 2011

Conquer The Universe With Jeff Jawer!

Q: What do "Your Astrology Guide 2011," "Your Personal Astrology Planner 2011," "Medical Astrology: Healing For The 21st Century," the regular forecast in "Mountain Astrologer" magazine, and Astro*Carto*Graphy all have in common?

A: Jeff Jawer. And he's going to be on my show tonight at 10 PM Eastern/7 PM Pacific!

Yeah, that's one heck of a resumé. Not only that though... he's also a great guy. We'll be taking an in-depth look at the year ahead and how it's going to affect you.




Check out my show! If you like what you hear... there's more to come in the future! Please feel free to drop by and visit my Donations Page. It's what keeps me going and, and you might just get a surprise...

And yes, I still send free stuff to everyone who writes me!


If you're new to this blog, here's a sample of my previous shows and blog entries. Enjoy!

Tuesday, April 19, 2011

Conquer The Universe With Nadiya Shah!

Today at 2 PM Eastern (11 AM Pacific)... I'm thrilled to have as my guest astrologer Nadiya Shah, author of  Astrology: Symbology And Divination. That, and (even better!) we'll be answering your questions either from the Chat Room, or live if you call (323) 442-7252!

CLICK BELOW TO LISTEN!



Check out my show! If you like what you hear... there's more to come in the future! Please feel free to drop by and visit my Donations Page. It's what keeps me going and, and you might just get a surprise...

And yes, I still send free stuff to everyone who writes me!

Sunday, April 17, 2011

Conquer The Week With Astrology - April 18-22, 2011

Give me five minutes of your time... I'll give you a work week's worth of forecast!




Check out my show! If you like what you hear... there's more to come in the future! Please feel free to drop by and visit my Donations Page. It's what keeps me going and, and you might just get a surprise...

And yes, I still send free stuff to everyone who writes me!


If you're new to this blog, here's a sample of my previous shows and blog entries. Enjoy!

Saturday, April 16, 2011

Doctor Pluto's House Of Horrors



Tonight on "Conquer The Universe With Astrology": your questions answered, the follow-up to last night's rude show about duck sex, and a look at Pluto.

Do not stare directly into the Pluto.




Check out my show! If you like what you hear... there's more to come in the future! Please feel free to drop by and visit my Donations Page. It's what keeps me going and, and you might just get a surprise...

And yes, I still send free stuff to everyone who writes me!


If you're new to this blog, here's a sample of my previous shows and blog entries. Enjoy!

Friday, April 15, 2011

Ding Dong, Duck Dong: The Uranus-Pluto Square Wakeup Call

Why do ducks have such enormous penises?

What does pot smoking in Canada have to do with your mid-life crisis?

What does Catherine Zeta-Jones' recent admission to psychiatric care have to do with you if you were born in 1969-1970?

What does this all have to do with the Uranus-Pluto square?

Listen tonight to find out at 11 PM Eastern (8 PM Pacific)...


(Special Grown-Up Language Warning for tonight's show. There's some transits you can't describe properly without swearing a lot.)

Check out my show! If you like what you hear... there's more to come in the future! Please feel free to drop by and visit my Donations Page. It's what keeps me going and, and you might just get a surprise...

And yes, I still send free stuff to everyone who writes me!


If you're new to this blog, here's a sample of my previous shows and blog entries. Enjoy!

Tuesday, April 12, 2011

Neptune in Pisces: Earthquake And Hurricane

Tomorrow at 4 PM Pacific (1 PM Pacific) on Conquer The Universe With Astrology": I'll be discussing the Neptune in Pisces years. May God Have mercy on us all.

No, scratch that... may we all have mercy on each other. Maybe God has had quite enough of us yelling at Him to fix the mess we've made for ourselves.


"Hurricane hurricane
A mighty earthquake and a hurricane
The earth cracked open and was breathing fire
Everybody's running none ready to die
Some going crazy some insane
Saying save me from the mighty hurricane
People scrambling and on the run
Like they were hit with the atom bomb
Some lay cripple some lay lame
Just save me from the mighty hurricane
Rich folks falling down on their knees
Begging lord have mercy if you please
Take all of my money I don't need a thing
Just save me from the mighty hurricane"

-Willie Dixon

...here's Lurrie Bell's perfectly appropriate cover version. Have a listen, and join me tomorrow.

video

Thursday, April 7, 2011

To All The Signs I Loved Before

Tonight on "Conquer The Universe With Astrology": a special trip around the Zodiac with twelve true-life tales of love, romance, tragedy, hilarity, infidelity, comfort, joy, seafood and kitchen appliances. Listen in and see if my experiences with The Twelve Signs match up with yours...


Check out my show! If you like what you hear... there's more to come in the future! Please feel free to drop by and visit my Donations Page. It's what keeps me going and, and you might just get a surprise...

And yes, I still send free stuff to everyone who writes me!


If you're new to this blog, here's a sample of my previous shows and blog entries. Enjoy!

Wednesday, April 6, 2011

Free Live Astrology Readings? Why Not!

Although most of you here are familiar with my regular show, "Conquer The Universe With Astrology," many of you may not know I also appear Wednesdays on The Caribbean Radio Show.


Got a question? Call and ask LIVE... (661) 467-2407.


Check out my show! If you like what you hear... there's more to come in the future! Please feel free to drop by and visit my Donations Page. It's what keeps me going and, and you might just get a surprise...

And yes, I still send free stuff to everyone who writes me!


If you're new to this blog, here's a sample of my previous shows and blog entries. Enjoy!

Tuesday, April 5, 2011

Neptune In Pisces - The Peasants Are Revolting (And You Don't Smell So Good Either)

So, what happens when The Lord Of Dreams enters The Sign Of The Dreamers? Is it a time when dreams can come true? Is it a time of Magic and Wonder and Fairy Tale Endings? Will the true power of the Human Spirit and Imagination be unleashed to form a world worthy of our highest aspirations?

Will we all hold hands and collectively dream a better world for ourselves?

I dunno. Ask a Teabagger or a Birther or a Terrorist or a Socialist or a Revolutionary or a Gitmo Detainee or any of the other many, many Spooks and Ghosties scratching at the door of our collective unconscious trying to find an entry into our world.

Or better yet... ask an astrologer.


How will the affect you personally? Give me a call at (323) 443-7252 and find out!

"...wake up..."


Check out my show! If you like what you hear... there's more to come in the future! Please feel free to drop by and visit my Donations Page. It's what keeps me going and, and you might just get a surprise...

And yes, I still send free stuff to everyone who writes me!


If you're new to this blog, here's a sample of my previous shows and blog entries. Enjoy!

Monday, April 4, 2011

Conquer The Week With Astrology - April 4-8, 2011

There aren't a whole lot of bonuses that come from waking up and facing the day on a Monday morning, but heres' one of them: my new feature, "Conquer Your Week With Astrology"... my new five-day weekday forecast on Blogtalkradio! It's five days in five minutes, covering the astro-mood for the week ahead, and is a natural compliment to my Weekend Romance Forecast at Astrologydating.com.

THIS WEEK: My... what big Void Of Course Moons you have, Grandma...

Please have a listen... and then get back to work. Neptune is in Pisces now, and everyone else at the office will likely be having a nap.


Check out my show! If you like what you hear... there's more to come in the future! Please feel free to drop by and visit my Donations Page. It's what keeps me going and, and you might just get a surprise...

And yes, I still send free stuff to everyone who writes me!


If you're new to this blog, here's a sample of my previous shows and blog entries. Enjoy!

Thursday, March 31, 2011

New Moon In Aries? Shut The Hell Up!

Holy crap! There's a freakin' New Moon in Aries coming up with six freakin' planets in Aries coming up! WTF? How the hell's THAT going to affect you? And how do you find out the answer to that right freakin' NOW?


Got questions? Give me a call at (323) 443-7252 and I'll answer 'em. But, hurry up. I ain't got all day!


Check out my show! If you like what you hear... there's more to come in the future! Please feel free to drop by and visit my Donations Page. It's what keeps me going and, and you might just get a surprise...

And yes, I still send free stuff to everyone who writes me!


If you're new to this blog, here's a sample of my previous shows and blog entries. Enjoy!