Thursday, October 30, 2008

One More Kick At The Sarah Palin Can Before The Election

Those of you who have been reading this blog for a while know about my deep and profound annoyance at the unconfirmed rumour that Republican VP candidate Sarah Palin was born at 4:40 PM and thus has Leo rising. And I'm not just annoyed by this because my own work points towards a birth time earlier in the day. Fortunately, I think I've found a form of proof.

Go ahead and look for yourself, in any source material you care to look at. Leo rising has a fondness for expensive, classy, tasteful clothing. Of course, Sarah looked fantastic at the Republican Convention, and has been pretty well-dressed since then. Much has been made of the $150,000 spent on clothes for her and her family... and many commentators have cried foul at the attention that expenditure has gotten.

(Strangely, none of these commentators have retracted their digs about John Edward's $400 haircut. And none of them seem to have minded Mitt Romney's expenditures on makeup. But I digress...)

So, here's a picture of how Ms. Palin dressed herself last January, during a teleconference.

Now, what was that you were saying about Leo Rising...?

Wednesday, October 22, 2008

Thirteen Days Before The Exact Saturn-Uranus Opposition...

The ongoing Saturn-Uranus opposition becomes exact on November 4th... Election Day in the United States. And I know that astrologers sometimes have the reputation (and sometimes rightly so) for being prophets of doom. Myself included, when it comes to the subject of the upcoming US Election. So, let me reassure you that everything is just fine, and will remain so. Other than a few minor glitches, of course.

Like in California, where Mark Jacoby... the owner of a firm hired by the California Republican Party to register voters... is arrested for fraudulently registering to vote in California himself, in order to legally be able to be register other "California" voters. This, after dozens of complaints to local police by people claiming they were tricked into registering as Republicans.

Also, the politicians in New Jersey are insisting their voting machines are safe from potential hacks, despite a report from Princeton University to the contrary. What do eggheads know anyway? Besides, New Jersey is legally obligated to modify their system to provide a verifiable paper trail of votes. Current deadline: January 1st, 2009... after missing the last two deadlines.

And in Florida, where all this nonsense started in 2000? Well... two elections later... everyone in an official position sounds very optimistic that their new optical scan ballot system will work just fine. And oh, by the way... Florida recently turned up 3,500 missing ballots from a recent judicial vote. Good news: they were found perfectly safe in a warehouse, in mint condition, safely uncounted. This probably explains why advance polling with good old-fashioned paper ballots appears to be so popular in Florida. Too bad that the unusually large, heavy paper ballots require extra postage, jeopardizing up to 95,000 votes.

Other than that though, American votes look secure... except in West Virginia, where the dreaded voting machines are switching votes from Obama to McCain. And in North Carolina, where advance voters are being heckled and harassed. And in Ohio, where the governor is accusing the Republican Party of legal harassment tactics of Democrat voters. And in Tennessee, where voting for Obama means hitting the Obama button several times until it selects the right candidate. And...

Then there's the ACORN business. The Republican Party has been trying to link the Obama campaign to a voter-registration sweep that has been responsible for signing up (it seems) both convicted felons and outright fictional people. However, given that US Federal Law requires all first-time voters produce official ID in order to vote, this is unlikely to have any effect at all... unless there's a factory out there somewhere cranking out official-looking driver's licences for Mickey Mouse, Abraham Lincoln, and Tony Soprano. Of course, even that is being disputed now, as the Democrats are in court in Georgia and Indiana, claiming the voter ID laws there are a form of voter suppression.

Strange thing about the planets... and not just Saturn and Uranus: it's a beautiful, elegant system... but it sure as hell isn't a democracy. The sky left that sort of thing up to you and me.

Friday, October 17, 2008

Britney Spears: Through Pluto And Out The Other Side

All is well in the heavens for once.... at least as far as Britney Spears is concerned. Her new single, "Womanizer," is at the top of the charts... the first time she's hit Billboard's Number One slot since One More Time, way back in the 20th Century.

In a birth chart, career and one's place in the public is rulerd by the Midheaven (MC). Britney's MC is at 3 degrees Cancer, ruler by her natal Moon at 12 degrees Aquarius. For the first time in a long time, the planets are playing along with these placements.

Pluto has been doing a number on Brit for a while now... conjuncting her natal Neptune, it has made for all kinds of trouble with drugs, alcohol, and delusion. Fortunately that appears to be over, as Pluto finally makes its way into Capricorn. It's also now approaching the opposition to Britney's Midheaven. This could be scary news for some upon first hearing it... but the transit looks to be quite constructive, to me anyway. I wouldn't be surprised if the next two years we see Brit go through a major career change for the better... maybe shifting into a different style of music, or getting more recognition for her acting abilities.

And with secondary progressed Moon and Venus both rolling into conjunction range of her natal Moon, Britney can expect the news to be more good than bad for her career for months to come.

See, Brit? I told you things would get better eventually. Now... what can we do about that sister of yours...?



It's a reading, it's a forecast, it's a book... all for less than the cost of a reading! It's Conquer The Universe With Astrology! And the amazing Recession Buster Forecast Deal is still going strong! Write me with your date, time, and city of birth here for more details. And please specify if you are interested in the book, the Recession Buster forecast, or both. They're both good, and both come with surprise bonuses!

Wednesday, October 8, 2008

Relationships: Breaking The Language Barrier

My neighbors moved here from Germany. They have two cats: one was born here, and the other came with them. They both wander outside on occasion, and I get to see them.

The Canadian cat has always been very friendly. The German Cat has always been distant and stand-offish. I am the same person with both of them, and dismissed the German Cat's attitude as being a result of his personality... because, after all, cats have birth charts too.

I was outside earlier today, watching Canadian Cat's ongoing (and thus far, incredibly unsuccessful) efforts to catch a squirrel, when German Cat wandered by. I've gotten used to the idea that he has no interest in me... or apparently, anyone or anything else.

Nonetheless, I tried something different this time. I addressed him in German.

And now I have a new friend.

There is a lesson in this, I believe, if you are having trouble with your love life and are busy studying your own birth chart. You'd be surprised how many people make this mistake... myself included.

Remember this, next time your Aries is being too "obnoxious," your Taurus too "stubborn," your Gemini too "unfocused," your Cancer too "moody," your Leo too "self-absorbed," your Virgo too "picky," your Libra too "wishy-washy," your Scorpio too "intense," your Sagittarius too "ungrounded," your Capricorn too "dour," your Aquarius too "weird," or your Pisces too "emotional."

Half the battle of making any relationship work boils down to learning the language.



Monday, October 6, 2008

The Astrology Of Melamine: China, Deception, And Neptune In Your Milk

One thing that always fascinates me about astrology: "mundane astrology" (reading the birth chart of a company or a country) works just as well as reading the birth chart of an individual person.

Consider the case of China. In the recent past, China has attempted to polish their image with other nations via the spectacle of the Beijing Olympics (birth chart for the People's Republic Of China here). The problem here is that, although the intentions are good... the astrology is terrible. Not only did the Olympics turn out to be (at best) a mixed blessing for China, but China is now the subject of a great deal of foreign press. Not in a good way, though.

China's economy relies heavily on exports, especially of food products. China's national "birth chart" has Venus in the 9th House (which in a country's chart rules exports), so this is no surprise. But that Venus, at 19 degrees Scorpio, has been squared for some time by transiting Neptune. Neptune, traditionally, rules delusion and deception.

Another thing Neptune rules? Poison.

In 2006 China was reported to have a "serious surplus" of the stuff lying around, largely as a side effect of China's dependence on coal gasification technology. There are a lot of legitimate industrial uses for melamine, but of course that isn't why the stuff is in the news lately. Melamine is also useful for faking out chemical tests for protein content.

In other words: it helps you pass off not food as food.

This first started making news in early 2007 when it was discovered that dogs and cats were dying because of melamine poisoning. Melamine had been added to pet food to mask a relatively low protein content. In other words, it was a deliberate contaminant added to cover up a deliberate lack of nutritional substance. China of course promised to clean up its act, and that it wouldn't happen again. It was an isolated incident, limited to pet food.

...And then the bad milk turned up. It turned up in candy. It turned up in chocolate. It turned up in baby formula. It has killed at least four children and made over 53,000 children sick.

Neptune doesn't pass out of square range to China's Venus until early 2010. Until then, your best bet is to be very un-Neptunian with your grocery-buying habits, and read the country of origin on your food products... immediately after you notice that fabulous sale price.

In true Neptunian-delusional form, even that may not be enough. You see, although all food products have to be labeled as to their country of origin, all of the individual ingredients don't have to be labeled as to where they came from. And many food products around the world are made from imported ingredients. A lot of those come from China.

Be cautious next time you see a food bargain. After all... some bargains can kill.

Thursday, October 2, 2008

Say Nice Things About Mercury Before The Debate

Although I am still laid low with the Mercury Retrograde flu, I wanted to briefly mention that I am really looking forward to the Biden-Palin debate tonight. Given that transiting Mars is squaring Sarah Palin's natal Mercury (and possibly her Moon) and is quincunxing Biden's Uranus (which rules his Third House... speaking, among other things), we could be in for a wild one, even more so than Biden's reputation for running his mouth and Palin's reputation for sounding like a dumbass would indicate. So far there doesn't seem to be a huge consensus on how the election is shaping up, except that Obama appears to be holding a slight lead.

Yes. I admit it. I will be watching the debate for the same reason that many watch auto racing: just to see if there are any terrible crashes.

And, based on recent events in the US regarding voters lists, I am more convinced than ever that my prediction of mayhem, with this Election Day being a massive screw-up is going to come true.

Mostly though, this blog entry is one last attempt to appease the Angry Retrograde God before anything else goes haywire in my life. Doctors still get sick, lawyers get sued, and astrologers have difficult transits.

So, today's assignment? Say nice things about Mercury. Please. You know Biden and Palin didn't...