Venus in Pisces, Mars in Virgo: Pinky And The Brain Try Internet Dating

(Venus in Pisces is considered to be an "exalted" placement: full of open-hearted non-judgmental love and willingness to express it. Mars in Virgo is looking to win by analyzing the details. The two positions are opposite each other, and Venus opposition Mars is in full effect now.)

***

(SCENE: Late night at Acme Laboratories. In a darkened corner two laboratory mice in a cage are huddled over a tiny little computer, checking out a dating site.)

PINKY: Oy, what about this one, Brain? She seems really nice, and oh look... she likes long walks! That could come in handy. Narf!

BRAIN: Don't be ridiculous, Pinky. Pay attention to the rest of her ad. "Must be goal-oriented and self sufficient."

PINKY: Well, that's you, isn't it?

BRAIN: That's a code-phrase for "she's a gold-digger" Pinky. You know I can't touch my savings. I need it for a new Death Ray!

PINKY: Oh, okay. Hey, look at this ad! She says she's easygoing and appreciates being able to relax with a loved one over a glass of fine wine!

BRAIN: She has low standards and a drinking problem. Next!

PINKY: Well, SurferGirl67 likes classical music like you do...

BRAIN: I hate what she's done with her hair.

PINKY: This one has a fondness for animals...

BRAIN: I am an animal! She'd never be faithful!

PINKY: SunshineLover81 enjoys spending time on the beach and --

BRAIN: --and is an unmotivated skin-cancer candidate.

PINKY: AudreyJ has loved and lost but is ready to try again...

BRAIN: Too many issues with her ex.

PINKY: JJLaRue says she's wild, spontaneous, and affectionate...

BRAIN: Tramp.

PINKY: IowaHomegirl wants a committed relationship that lines up with her values...

BRAIN: Prude.

PINKY: Narf! You aren't making this easy, Brain! You're analyzing everything to death!

BRAIN: (Turns off computer and walks to the edge of the cage, stares off into the distance) Enough of this foolishness! You know what we're going to do tonight, Pinky?

PINKY: Go out and try to find someone in person, so we can see them for who they really are instead of dismissing them offhandedly based on a few lines of type and a couple of pictures?

BRAIN: No Pinky. We're going to try to take over the world with my army of remote controlled pigeons I've trained to poop on anyone whop dares challenge our dominance. It's a much more practical and achievable goal.

PINKY: (sighs) I'm lonely.

BRAIN: Shut up Pinky.

(This Thursday on "Conquer The Universe With Astrology":  it's Astrology: The Pants-Optional Venus And Mars Show." Click HERE to set a reminder... and bring a date if you like.)

Check out my show! If you like what you hear... there's more to come in the future! Please feel free to drop by and visit my Donations Page. It's what keeps me going and, and you might just get a surprise...And yes, I still send free stuff to everyone who writes me!

If you're new to this blog, here's a sample of my previous shows and blog entries. Enjoy!

Astrology: Twelve Signs Of Love

Tonight on a Mercury Retrograde encore edition of "Conquer The Universe With Astrology": stuff from last December you probably missed:

HOUR ONE: "Twelve Signs Of Love": true-life stories of love, hilarity, romance, tragedy, sex, friendship, and kitchen appliances based on my e-book, "Love Around The Zodiac."

HOUR TWO: Also from December... my interview with legendary astrologer Michael Lutin!

10 PM Eastern, 7 PM Pacific

CLICK HERE NOW TO LISTEN OR SET A REMINDER!

Check out my show! If you like what you hear... there's more to come in the future! Please feel free to drop by and visit my Donations Page. It's what keeps me going and, and you might just get a surprise...

Come And Conquer The Universe With Marguerite Manning!

Marguerite Manning, author of "Cosmic Karma," is not only a brilliant astrologer, not only a great person overall, but (best of all)... she's my guest on the show today at 4 PM Eastern, 1 PM Pacific! Have a listen...

Got questions? We'll answer them LIVE... call (323) 443-7252!

Conquer The Universe With Astrology - Bringing The Love On Valentine's Day

Join me today at a very special time -- 1 PM Eastern (10 AM Pacific) -- on a very special day -- Valentine's Day -- for some very special...

(Ahem.)

You know, Valentine's Day is a problematic occasion for a lot of us. It's about Love, of course... and that sort of thing should be celebrated as often as possible, in all its forms. But a lot of people get bent out of shape because they don't "have a Valentine," or the one they have isn't performing up to expectations. Whether you want love, have love, are trying to shake it loose, turn it up, cope with it or get over it... I'm here for you and I'll answer your questions about it. Or about anything else for that matter. Join me in the Chat Room, and call (323) 443-7252 with your questions.

CLICK HERE TO LISTEN OR SET A REMINDER

And at the end of today's show, I'm going to do something Very Naughty in public for your enjoyment.

***

TOMORROW at 4 PM Eastern (1 PM Pacific): Join me and my guest Marguerite Manning, author of "Cosmic Karma," as we discuss Venus and Mars with our Valentine's Post-Game Analysis!

CLICK HERE TO LISTEN OR SET A REMINDER

Love Around The Zodiac, Part II

The Venus-Pluto conjunction is now in effect! One way or another, love is on a lot of minds. So...

If you missed last night's show (here's the archive if you did), you missed six true-life tales of love and sex and intrigue and kitchen appliances... some gone right, some gone wrong, but all illustrating the love styles (one way or another) of six of the signs of the Zodiac. If you yourself haven't got a date tonight (or if you're looking for an excuse to ditch the one you have), join us at 10 PM Eastern (7 PM Pacific) for Part II of "Conquer The Universe With Astrology - Love Around The Zodiac"! If you can listen live, drop by the Chat Room. And if you have any questions, call me at (323) 443-7252. I'll have a look at your love life... or anything else for that matter. Either way, a good time is guaranteed. 

And if you do have a hot date tonight, congratulations. You can always listen to the podcast tomorrow.

CLICK HERE TO LISTEN OR SET A REMINDER!

Your Dream Date With An Astrologer

Hi. You look lovely this evening. You have that certain sparkle in your eyes... it must be the Venus-Pluto conjunction working its magic. I can't imagine someone like you could be all alone on a Friday night...

But of course, if you are... join me for the first of a special two-part episode of "Conquer The Universe With Astrology" tonight at 10 PM Eastern 7 PM Pacific, based on my e-book, "Love Around The Zodiac." I'll be reading selections from the book and answering questions about your love life (or anything else for that matter). Join me in the Chat Room, or call (323) 443-7252. If you're not happy with the state of your love life, we can look into what you can do about it, and when things will get better. And... if you are happy with the state of your love life... feel free to bring a date.

Part I Tonight:

CLICK HERE TO LISTEN OR SET A REMINDER

Part II, same time Saturday:

CLICK HERE TO LISTEN OR SET A REMINDER

Also: I can't squeeze a corsage through my modem, but if you write me, I'll send you your FREE guide to the Astrology of 2011! I tried sending a glass of red wine through the computer once... don't ask how that turned out.

Moon Conjunct Venus - Sweetness And Light

On a special surprise edition of "Conquer The Universe With Astrology"... today at 6 PM Eastern, 3 PM Pacific... the Moon will be conjunct Venus in Sagittarius. So, I've decided to dedicate a show to that sweet ol' girl Venus herself, how to understand your own Venus, and how to use that to get exactly what you want out of life. Sure that mostly means "love"... but it can mean money too.

Also: The hidden Venus-Saturn connection most people aren't aware of, and how it can be of use to you.

I'll be answering your questions live too! Drop by the Chat Room, or call me at  1 (323) 443-7252.

Venus always gets what she wants, one way or another, eventually. Find out how you can do the same!

CLICK HERE TO LISTEN OR SET A REMINDER!

Conquer The Universe Like A Millionaire Matchmaker!

Tonight on "Conquer The Universe With Astrology" my guest will be Dr. Craig Martin, professional astrologer best known for his work with Patti Stanger on "Millionaire Matchmaker"! Here's the link so you can listen live, or click HERE to set a reminder...

As always, we're going to have a good time. And hey, did you catch yesterday's totally-by-surprise after noon show (scroll down if you didn't). We had a good time. Where were you? Good thing the podcast is still available...

Listen to internet radio with MatthewAstrologer on Blog Talk Radio

Look Good And Attract Love With Astrology!

On a special day and time... today at 5 PM Eastern, 2 PM Pacific... my show will be all about the power of seductiveness. Namely, your seductiveness, charm, and sex appeal... how to find it in your birth chart and how to work it to maximum effect! And of course... free stuff for everyone who writes in!

Join me, won't you? Wear something comfortable.

And for those of you who missed it, here's last night show... Michael Lutin and Me vs. Ophiuchus (among other things)!

Maximize Your Attractiveness With Astrology

In the spirit of yesterday's installment of "Conquer The Universe With Astrology," it's time once again to take charge of your life and get what you want, instead of just sitting around waiting for things to fall out of the sky at you. Friday at 5 PM Eastern (2 PM Pacific... a special time!) I'm going to look at very specific strategies for both maximizing your personal attractiveness... and how to gain the upper hand with the target of your affections!

So: whether your an Aries Taurus Gemini Cancer Leo Virgo Libra Scorpio Sagittarius Capricorn Aquarius or Pisces (whew!), or just want to date or charm or seduce one... this show is for you!

I'll be taking you calls too during the show, at (323) 443 -7252. And... if you don't have the details of your birth chart (or if you'd just like me to send you a freebie) write me for more!

Conquer The Universe With Astrology: Look Good And Attract Love!

Click here to listen or set a reminder!

PS: Don't forget about tomorrow night's show with the amazing Michael Lutin!

Love, Astrology, And Alchemy!

Ever notice how the Universe occasionally conspires to make you wait for something important? You Big Moment, meeting your Soul Mate, or (in this case) having the previously-postponed Jessica Shepherd on "Conquer The Universe With Astrology"...

On tonight's show: an interview with Jessica Shepherd, Author of "A Love Alchemist's Notebook." Not only is Jessica an astrologer who knows a thing or two about thinking with your Venus... she's written a guide as to what you can actually do with it, in practical terms, to find The One!

CLICK HERE TO LISTEN, SET A REMINDER, OR LISTEN TO THE ARCHIVE!

10 PM Eastern, 7 PM Pacific. The Chat Room will be open a few minutes early... drop by before all the best hors d'oeuvres are gone.

Also tonight: your questions answered, so gimme a call! And as always... free stuff for anyone who writes me!

(And hey... that "thinking with your Venus" line? That was her, not me.)

Glorious Romantic Victory With Astrology TONIGHT!

Looking for True Love? Glorious Romantic Victory is at hand, Comrades!

"Hey, Comrade! The path To Glorious Romantic Victory doesn't involve drunk dialing your ex! You should use Venus Retrograde to review the past and learn from it... not to use the past as an escape! You'd better listen to 'Conquer The Universe With Astrology' TONIGHT for a little re-training!"

CLICK HERE TO LISTEN OR SET A REMINDER!

(Then, a few days later...)

"Thanks for the love life advice, Comrade Astrologer, and for the free e-books!"

NEXT WEEK: The Triumphant Return of Christopher Witecki of Soulgarden.tv! Click and set that reminder!

NOVEMBER 18TH: Haven't found The One just yet? Jessica Shepherd, astrologer and author of "A Love Alchemist's Notebook" is going to be here to help you fix that! Don't miss it!

Fix Your Love Life With Astrology In Three Easy Steps!

Step One: Join me and author of "Cosmic Karma: Understanding Your Contract with the Universe" Marguerite Manning (http://www.margueritemanning.com/) on her show for our conversation: "The 7th House: Who’s The Matter With Me?" Wednesday at 7 PM Eastern, 4 PM Pacific!

CLICK HERE TO LISTEN OR SET A REMINDER

Step Two: Grab your birth chart! What, you say you don't have your birth chart? You don't know much about astrology? I've got a chart for you for free... just go to Astrologydating.com and sign up (for free!) and you'll get your chart and Personality Profile. It's a good one, and well worth having.

Step Three: Join me on my show Thrusday, when we'll put it all together into a sure-fire solution for all your Love Life Woes!*

CLICK HERE TO LISTEN OR SET A REMINDER

And as always... send me an e-mail with your questions, or just to score your freebie e-book!

*(Your mileage may vary)

The Astrology Of Bad Love

Over the years as an astrologer, I've seen a lot of bad relationships. And I look at relationships a lot in my role as the blogger for Astrologydating.com. I've also seen a fair number of good ones of course, but let's be honest -- it's the bad ones you often learn the most from. Now although I can't say I've gotten the keys to the "perfect" (ha!) relationship here in my back pocket, but I've certainly observed where a lot of the problems come from.

I've combined much of my material on this subject in a new e-book...

The Astrology Of Bad Love

When The Stars Are Right But Your Heart (Or Head) Isn’t… Or Is That The Other Way Around?

...along with new material you haven't seen anywhere else.

And unlike your last bad relationship... this won't cost you a thing. No, really. It's free. Free. All you have to do is write me and ask for it just like my last freebie (which if you ask for it now... you'll get that TOO).

Whether you're a total beginner at Astrology, or have gotten a little deeper into the dynamics of astrology and relationships... or are just looking for the occasional pained chuckle at how this things can go off the rails... "The Astrology Of Bad Love" has something for you.

What's not to love about THAT?

Dropping Off Your Emotional Baggage At The Venus Station

Venus comes to a "station" tomorrow and turns backwards... retrograde. If you've been exposed to much astrology in your time, you're probably familiar with the effect of Mercury Retrogrades. I never used to put too much stock in them... and still don't cringe in superstitious terror of them as some do (even though The Universe has occasionally backhanded me for that attitude)

Astrology should be more than just a matter of "good times are coming next week" or "it's about to hit the fan." Most people don't pay attention to a weather forecast just to bitch about the rain... they do it so they know whether or not to take an umbrella. So, with this in mind, I'd like to present my prescription for the upcoming Venus station and retrograde.

Just as thought and communication can get screwy during a Mercury retrograde, matters of love and money can go similarly awry during a Venus retrograde. But knowing that the conditions are coming, you can take the appropriate actions.

Of course, the effects of this Venus retrograde will depend on the placements in your birth chart. But just as a general precaution, now is a good time to reflect on the state of your heart (and your wallet). As Venus is currently in Aries, the temptation is to leap at love... and being retrograde, the temptation isn't tempered by what most people would consider to be complete rationality.

I know I'm going to be taking the time in the next couple of days to take a good long look at things, and make some cuts. And maybe... just maybe... a couple of leaps. After all, Venus is in Aries... and what's the point to anything being in Aries without being a little bold about it?

.

The Amazing Surprise Economic Turnaround Astrology Experiment continues! Click here to read more, and to join in!

Astrological Snapshots: True Tales Of Anonymous Old Loves

I've wanted to write more about compatibility here, but I haven't given in to the temptation to talk about my own experiences. That didn't seem right somehow, given that talking about old relationships naturally means talking about the other person... and this isn't one of those blogs where I'm going to go on about specifics, like how Heppa The Icelandic Stripper promised me the world and then broke my heart. It's not my style to wave other people's dirty laundry around in public.

I've found a solution. Below you will find snapshots presented in random order -- brief extracts from the birth charts of some Significant Others -- and how that part of them interacted with me both astrologically and observably.

Should any of the exes mentioned here come across this blog, they'll probably recognize themselves. So, for you: you've been immortalized, in public, yet anonymously.

Isn't that cunning of me? You always loved my brainpower...


A:

Her Moon/Ascendant trines my Sun

Her Venus sextiles my Venus

Her Mars squares my Saturn

What fantastic buddies! What jolly partners in crime! Everything was great... but we fought. Neither of us wanted it, but the amazing energies released by Mars and Saturn always ended up coming out as anger and hostility in the end. We were like a nature film of two ants fighting, where one ant gets his head ripped off... but he keeps fighting anyway. Over and over and over...

Other than the frequent decapitations, it was great.

B:

Her North Node conjuncts my Sun

Her Venus squares my Venus

Her Moon/Uranus conjunction squares my Moon/Mars opposition

I think you saw in me everything that you ultimately wanted in a man. What I don't think you saw... and what I didn't want to admit I saw... is that we started off in different directions and never really grew together. Which is a shame, because in a world full of crazy people, your craziness was kind and decent. May your Soul Mate Quest end as magically as you deserve.

C:

Her Moon conjuncts my Moon (in Cancer)

Her Jupiter squares my Venus

Her Sun conjuncts my Uranus/Pluto conjunction

You're so sweet and so caring, and you love cookies as much as I do. And you are beautiful: beautiful enough to make a living from it, but too modest and shy to make a real go of it. Which is a shame, because that quality only makes you more beautiful. You wear it well, and it reflects what's inside you.

Too bad you thought I was completely nuts and unstable and I was completely NOT what your family wanted for you.

D:

Her Mercury/Mars/Jupiter conjunction sextiles my Moon/trines my Mars

Her Pluto EXACTLY opposes my Saturn

Oh God! Everything about us was fantastic, from the bedroom where it started into the wild strange world we discovered together. But we were doomed and unstable together... as doomed and unstable as we were as individuals at that time. But, out of everyone listed here... I still empathize with you most of all. Shine on, you crazy diamond.

E:

Her Sun squares my Moon and Mars

Her Neptune conjuncts my Sun

Her Saturn/South Node forms no aspects to anything in my chart

We certainly got each other's attention, and in many ways seemed to be the answer to each other's prayers. We were everything the other was looking for. And yet it had all the staying power of a house of cards in a hurricane, and the practical obstacles that could have been overcome looked like mountains, from my angle.

So I choked.

F:

Her Ascendant conjuncts my Sun

Her Mercury opposes my Saturn

Her Sun squares my Mercury/Nodes

Everything about us had a feeling of Destiny. When we first met, casual though it was, time stopped, like a flashback scene from Highlander. We had known each other before, and would know each other again. And on top of that, we both seemed to be exactly what the other needed, even if we could never really define it. But when you told me you loved me... it felt forced. And I needed that from you, more than anything. More than with anyone else.

Of course, what I really needed was a mother, and what you really needed was a husband.

Too bad for both of us we already had those.

.

.

Valoween: A Very Pluto Valentine's Day

First, please read this bit of foolery from that other blog I do sometimes.

Now: there is absolutely nothing cuddly at all about today's Valentine's Day chart. If anything I think a lot of you out there, on one level or another, are likely to have a weird sense around today's traditional card and small gift/lack of card and/or lack of small gift (check whichever applies).

Maybe it's just Pluto, freshly into Capricorn. I've deliberately avoided reading anyone else's commentary on it, so forgive me if I've missed the consensus (if any) on the years we face ahead. I could say at this point "I think it has something to do with personal relationships" and that would be waaay too lame and vague. But I do think that is part of it, and I can't help but notice that on Valetine's Day today, Pluto stands on the threshold of new territory, with only a weak trine from Saturn to encourage it along.

Saturn, retrograde, in Virgo... grinding closer to the exact trine with Pluto. Picture an old man behind the wheel of a large car, backing into a tight parking space in a busy mall parking lot on Saturday. Kid's Day. And some of the kids are wearing explosives because it's also "International Revolutionary Appreciation Day" with the Sun and Neptune and the North Node all piled up in Aquarius.

You know something's gonna happen.

Besides... the bad days are just potholes on the road to where you're supposed to be... and that's probably a happier, saner place than you may have imagined. Maybe even today.

.

True Tales Of Teen Heartbreak: The Libra Guide To Compatibility

You hear a lot that Libras are all about the romance because it's a Venus-ruled sign. I'm not sure that's entirely the point. I think most people are suckers for a good romance story, with all the twists and turns required for Boy to finally be with Girl. And Libras love the "love story" part of Love. That's probably why you find so many Libras who have an interest in astrology... it's like one of those "making of" documentaries on a romance movie DVD.

Here are the payoffs and pitfalls of Libras relationships with the other signs, expressed in terms those lovers of love will appreciate. Something that captures all the vibrancy and willful disregard for reality that Libras crave.... romance comics!

ARIES: Pretty exciting stuff. Adventurous, motivated, and straight to the point. The problem is that even the best road has a couple of unexpected potholes... and Aries is just exciting enough to make you forget to put your helmet on.

TAURUS: They love the lovin' just as much as you do... and who couldn't love that? The problem: you love to be loved, but not necessarily possessed, and certainly not ordered around.

GEMINI: Charming. Witty. Fun. Affectionate. There will never be any doubt in your mind that Gemini loves you, except on the days his identical twin The Jerk shows up.

CANCER: Great depth of emotion. Tremendous power when in love. But when they cling to you... or when they think you're sneaking out to flirt with other boys... ouch!

LEO: Great fun. Terribly romantic. Irresistibly kitty-cuddly-cute when they put their mind to it. But notice how their picture is the biggest one in this article? That was Leo's idea, baby. Get used to it.

VIRGO: Admittedly they can be charming, and the things that logical little mind of there's can come up with are adorable. But let's be honest: some days they just aren't that romantic at all.

LIBRA: Okay, show of hands: how many of you out there can name a romance story you loved where two people who are completely different end up together anyway? Okay, now... how many of you can name a romance story you loved about two identical romantics who got together, everything was just great, and they spent the rest of their lives that way? Yeah, thought so. Romance is as much about the differences as it is about the similarities.

SCORPIO: Such passion! Such intensity! Such bruising when they slip and completely forget that a relationship is about compromise!

SAGITTARIUS: They're a lot of fun. They know how to have a good time. You'll like the playfulness. But will you ever get past that nagging notion they're just horsing around with the relationship instead of taking it seriously?

CAPRICORN: The good news: He's solid. He's dependable. He's determined and hard working. The bad news: this is the guy your Mom wanted you to marry. How appealing is that?

AQUARIUS: He has a light touch. He's interesting, intelligent, and different. The problem here is that he's on his own world half the time... not yours.

PISCES: What started out as a refreshing dip into the deep waters of Lake Dewey-Eyes can quickly turn into being surrounded by weird, creepy things that don't even breathe the same way you do. And believe me... on a bad day, you'll want to come up for air.

You'll find all my new stuff -- and maybe your soul mate -- at Astrologydating.com! Drop by and have a look...

Sowing The Seeds Of Love: The Taurus Guide To Compatibility

A Taurus, whether a man or a woman, has a reputation for not rushing into things. Of course when the heart calls, a Taurus responds just as quickly as anyone else. But how to nurture that relationship properly, and how to tell what kind of an emotional investment you've made? Will it be delicious, beautiful... or just a weed?

Here's a handy guide to your relationships, Taurus, based on how much work you'll have to put into them. Even the hardiest perrenials need some tending, and even the most difficult patch of soil can be made to sprout something beautiful. But some of those patches of soil are a lot easier to work than others...

RICH, DARK SOIL: The other Earth signs (Virgo and Capricorn), Cancer, and Pisces. These spots in the garden aren't going to need a lot of tending. Rich in emotion, yet cautious like yourself. A good long-term investment of your time and energy. Virgo may not always show as much blossom as you like, Capricorn sometimes has trouble taking root deeply, and Pisces tends to wander all over like a vine. Cancer has good tenacity, but needs encouragement to sprout.

FERTILE, BUT REQUIRES A LOT OF TENDING: Another Taurus or Scorpio. You'll probably have fun with these, but they're going to take more work than the average. Another Taurus may sound like a natural, but they can be as stubborn as you, and do you need more of that? Scorpio brings some dynamic blooms, but you may find it leeches too many nutrients from your soil.

SHADY, REQUIRES EXTRA FERTILIZER: Libra and Sagittarius. Like you, Libra is a Venus-ruled sign. This should make the two of you perfect, but Libra needs more attention than you might be ready to give it. As for Sagittarius: it's not the sort of thing you'd ever actually plan on planting, on the face of it... but it seems to work anyway. Bright foliage makes up for all the weeding and wandering into the neighbor's plot.

REQUIRES INTENSIVE WATERING: Aries and Gemini. These astrological neighbors can be appealing, but take a lot more work than most for you to maintain. Aries is always looking for a hotter climate to sprout in, and Gemini puts down its roots where you want them to go... and everywhere else, too. Neither one takes well to being pruned.

A TOUGH ROW TO HOE: Leo and Aquarius. Leo can make a flamboyant centerpiece to any garden. It's just that their wild impulsive growth spurts make them hard to manage, and the huge blooms distract from why you wanted a garden in the first place. Aquarius, like you, grows at its own pace, but you may end up accidentally fertilizing it to death trying to make it grow your way... something Aquarius just won't do.

No matter what relationship you find yourself in, there will be work. And there will be rewards. And as these things go, Taurus, some cliches are true. In romance, you really do have a green thumb!

You'll find all my new stuff -- and maybe your soul mate -- at Astrologydating.com! Drop by and have a look...

Beauty: Confirmed Without A Time Of Birth (Or A Picture!)

Apparently Charlize Theron is the Sexiest Woman In The World, at least according to Esquire magazine.

If you want some kind of an astrological explanation for this, it's a bit problematic. We don't have an accurate time of birth for Charlize. Fortunately, there is a relative simple Vedic technique that can help in cases like this.

Every aspect of life in a Vedic chart can be ruled by two planets. One of them is the planet ruling the house in question. In other words, if you were born with Taurus rising, you have Scorpio on the 7th. Therefore, your marriage is ruled by your Mars (the traditional ruler of Scorpio).

Each facet of your life also has a natural ruler: a karaka. For example, the karaka for marriage is Jupiter... so regardless of when you were born, we also look at your Jupiter for hints of how marriage will be for you.

If you have a birth chart without a time of birth, and still want to extract useful details about this or that are of life, just:

-Convert the chart to Sidereal. Quit complaining, that's what software is for, and you can get it for free out there.

-Rotate the chart until the karaka in question is on the Ascendant.

-Treat the entire sign the planet is in as the 1st house. In other words, if your Jupiter is at 27 degrees Gemini, then everything from 0-29 degrees Gemini is your first house, all of Cancer is the second, and so on.

-Voila! Charlize Theron's Venus chart has Sun, Moon, Mercury and Saturn in the 12th House in Cancer, which in the Vedic system rules, um, "bed pleasures." Having the Moon there, in the sign it rules, amplifies everything.

So you have a blind date with Charlize and she doesn't know her time of birth. I can't make you any guarantees about her personality yet, but damn... the chart says she's a looker.

(Another Vedic tidbit; with a Sun/Moon conjunction, she's probably better than average at math too. Bring that up over the appetizers and impress the hell out of her with your astrological skill!)

This raises two very important points: first of all, Western and Vedic have a lot to offer each other. Secondly, if you need an astrologer to tell you what's beautiful and what isn't, you probably don't deserve a date with Charlize Theron.

Of course, we're talking about a generic, cultural/genetic sort of beauty. When it comes to what each of us finds truly beautiful is entirely individual, based on who we are and the placements in our birth chart as much as anything else.

For example: I know who the Most Beautiful Girl In The World really is... but she's shy about it. So, no names.

.

If you'd like more information on what an astrological counseling session can do for you, or to inquire about my services, CLICK HERE. If you'd like a FREE (yes, FREE!) one-month customized forecast, send me your date, city, and (if known) time of birth. Again, it's free... regardless of what you look like.